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hmmm... Possablities?
So tomorrow is finally starting to look like another day, instead of just another chance for me to fuck my life up some more. I think somehow there must be something happining astrologicly because just about everyone I knows life is starting to look up. I like that idea, I hate to think that there is so much pain in the world.
I met two boi's this weekend. I always meet two at a time. I think that's so funny. I'll go without anyone to even smile at me for so long and then out of nowhere several show up.
The first I met on Halloween night. Yay! I knew I was going to be all over him from the second I saw him. Haha! He was wearing make-up! I've been starved for a boi in make-up for sooooooo long, and there he was. They walked us back to our apartment and I talked them in to coming back to watch Boondock Saints. I curled up with nate while watching it and that was nice. When the movie was over, we all went to bed and of course nate came to sleep with me. I was a litle embarassed at first for a couple of reasons 1. My room was a disaster and I'm so funny about people seeing it that way. I mean it's a mess all the time but I still hate people to see it that way. And the second reason was that Nate's friend made a comment alluding to the idea that I was going to sleep with nate. Whether or not it was true didn't matter it was the fact that it was pressumed that I was going to have sex with someone I just met that bothered me.
I'm not planing on kissing and posting it all over the web, but I'll admit that I had a great time.
The second boi, I met at R.E.L.I.C. Fun stuff I say. I'm such a damn role player. Never say never I tell you! It always comes back to bite me in the ass. It was a Blast though. I didn't have the $55 to spare so I monstared. It was fun. The point of monstering is to be the additions to the plot so that the Players have fun things to suprise them. Pretty much it meant that I got to get beat up on my a bunch of phome weapons a lot. I got to die a lot too. I got to see a lot of friends I don't get to see often which was really cool. Some people I expected to be there never showed though. Oh well. It was cold as fuck though. OMG we froze our buns off. I probably made myself more sick but hell I had fun so bah!
So anyway back to this second boi. I met him Saterday night just before I left. Amazingly he lives right around here and goes to KSU. Isn't it strange how You can drive three hours away just to meet someone that lives nextstore. I sat accross from him at the big 'feast'. We were OOC so we actually got to talk a bit. Ther was a lot of eye contact over diner and idle conversation; oh and smiles too. After diner I was outside smoking and he came up and was holding me for warmth. *G* I was awefully sleepy because I had just taken my cough suryp so it was very nice to have someone to lean on. There was lots of hugging and snuggling for the few hours that I was still there. yay!
It strange Chad is totally not my type. He's got facial hair for one! craziness! He is sweet and works in the theater so that is nice. *g* I think it's just that he's more masculin then what I normally go for. (IE he doesn't where a lot of make-up) I didn't get his # or give him mine but we'll see what happens. The last time I did that I got a response that was better then I could have hoped for. *sigh* memorries. But maybe I'll just to try and find him at his work or something. *g*
I have to admitt that a certin someone did find his way into my thoughts this weekend, But my object is to move on right? This weekend was a big step in that direction. Just because he's gone doesn't mean I have to be alone. That is very nice to know. I have new ones to turn my attention to, and people to dote on. I love romance and I feel empty when I don't have someone to pour it on.
I finished two more Terry Pratchet books and now I'm reading The Story of O. The Story of O is very sad for me. I'm often in tears or lost in the romance or longing. I am finding a great deal of what BDSM really means to me in it. I'm learing some new things that I need to set limits for. I'm learing how I really feel about giving up total control. Knowing what it would mean to be a slave rather then a sub. It's frighting But something I can't explain in words to people that don't know.
I am very happy to think that perhaps a new dawn is approching. =)
I met two boi's this weekend. I always meet two at a time. I think that's so funny. I'll go without anyone to even smile at me for so long and then out of nowhere several show up.
The first I met on Halloween night. Yay! I knew I was going to be all over him from the second I saw him. Haha! He was wearing make-up! I've been starved for a boi in make-up for sooooooo long, and there he was. They walked us back to our apartment and I talked them in to coming back to watch Boondock Saints. I curled up with nate while watching it and that was nice. When the movie was over, we all went to bed and of course nate came to sleep with me. I was a litle embarassed at first for a couple of reasons 1. My room was a disaster and I'm so funny about people seeing it that way. I mean it's a mess all the time but I still hate people to see it that way. And the second reason was that Nate's friend made a comment alluding to the idea that I was going to sleep with nate. Whether or not it was true didn't matter it was the fact that it was pressumed that I was going to have sex with someone I just met that bothered me.
I'm not planing on kissing and posting it all over the web, but I'll admit that I had a great time.
The second boi, I met at R.E.L.I.C. Fun stuff I say. I'm such a damn role player. Never say never I tell you! It always comes back to bite me in the ass. It was a Blast though. I didn't have the $55 to spare so I monstared. It was fun. The point of monstering is to be the additions to the plot so that the Players have fun things to suprise them. Pretty much it meant that I got to get beat up on my a bunch of phome weapons a lot. I got to die a lot too. I got to see a lot of friends I don't get to see often which was really cool. Some people I expected to be there never showed though. Oh well. It was cold as fuck though. OMG we froze our buns off. I probably made myself more sick but hell I had fun so bah!
So anyway back to this second boi. I met him Saterday night just before I left. Amazingly he lives right around here and goes to KSU. Isn't it strange how You can drive three hours away just to meet someone that lives nextstore. I sat accross from him at the big 'feast'. We were OOC so we actually got to talk a bit. Ther was a lot of eye contact over diner and idle conversation; oh and smiles too. After diner I was outside smoking and he came up and was holding me for warmth. *G* I was awefully sleepy because I had just taken my cough suryp so it was very nice to have someone to lean on. There was lots of hugging and snuggling for the few hours that I was still there. yay!
It strange Chad is totally not my type. He's got facial hair for one! craziness! He is sweet and works in the theater so that is nice. *g* I think it's just that he's more masculin then what I normally go for. (IE he doesn't where a lot of make-up) I didn't get his # or give him mine but we'll see what happens. The last time I did that I got a response that was better then I could have hoped for. *sigh* memorries. But maybe I'll just to try and find him at his work or something. *g*
I have to admitt that a certin someone did find his way into my thoughts this weekend, But my object is to move on right? This weekend was a big step in that direction. Just because he's gone doesn't mean I have to be alone. That is very nice to know. I have new ones to turn my attention to, and people to dote on. I love romance and I feel empty when I don't have someone to pour it on.
I finished two more Terry Pratchet books and now I'm reading The Story of O. The Story of O is very sad for me. I'm often in tears or lost in the romance or longing. I am finding a great deal of what BDSM really means to me in it. I'm learing some new things that I need to set limits for. I'm learing how I really feel about giving up total control. Knowing what it would mean to be a slave rather then a sub. It's frighting But something I can't explain in words to people that don't know.
I am very happy to think that perhaps a new dawn is approching. =)