transpao

So here I am. Just over a week on T. I've had a little bottom growth, and pretty much no other symptoms.

I started my cycle yesterday. for the first time in my life I had almost no symptoms. I didn't get incapacitating migraines. So in a way I guess my lack of symptoms is/was a symptom.

It is possible that the depression I have been in for the last few days is associated with my cycle. I hope that is the case, because if they aren't it could be very bad.

I have been increasingly overwhelmed by the thought of coming out, to the point of severe and prolonged panic attacks, followed by deep depression. If I cannot get a handle on this and find a way to live with coming out. I will be forced to go off the testosterone again.

If this is my only option, I am in a very bad way. I don't want to talk about the things going through my head.